Crypto Investing Bible

Real bibles are short, concise, and undebatable.

Here’s a very short guide on how to do well in crypto. If you follow it to the letter, you will make a fuckton of wealth and avoid losing your hard-earned money, sleep, and sanity.

This will keep being refined. Important metrics to watch will be added.

Bear market

  1. At the first confirmation get out of alts 100%, sit mostly in fiat;
  2. (Optional) Open a low leverage Bitcoin short;
  3. (Optional) Add to shorts on bounces; cover some at the consolidation after each leg down;
  4. Eventually, pick up alts that have a good chance to be heavily traded in the next bull run when they are down 90%+;
  5. Accumulate and measure everything in fiat.

Most important: Get in a jacuzzi with girls; hibernate; travel the world; pick up piano lessons. Don’t stare at charts all day long.

Bull market

  1. Open a low leverage Bitcoin long at the confirmation;
  2. (Optional) Add to longs on dips; close some at the consolidation after each leg up.
  3. Scale out of alts you bought in the bear market. Aim to sell 80% on 6x; sell everything on 9x (for Bitcoin);
  4. If an alt is double-topping before that, sell the fuck out of everything (for Bitcoin);
  5. DO NOT buy alts in a strong/late market. Missed a pump? Let it go. Remember you will be able to buy anything for a fraction of the current price.
  6. Accumulate and measure everything in Bitcoin.

Most important: If you have debt or a chance to diversify outside of crypto, don’t hesitate to take profit. Don’t brag about your crypto, don’t upgrade your lifestyle on paper wealth.

Current conditions:


Absolute bottom:


What to do:


The above is not financial advice, it’s just what I’m doing. If you ever put money where anonymous strangers tell you without your own research, god help you.


Why is this so short?
Is Macklemore the best rapper out there?
What's your favorite kebab sauce?
Why is this so short?

Because this is not a day trading tutorial. The aim of The Bible is to make as little trades as possible and catch as much upside as possible. You can make 5-10 trades a year, live your life, and end up better than 95% of traders who are busy losing their money. All this is just common sense, it always seems boring to those who think they can beat the market with hustle.

Is Macklemore the best rapper out there?

What the hell I don’t care. I mean don’t fall for memes like “HODL” or “100x”. In a maturing market, this is no longer feasible. You will hear these memes either from idiots or from seasoned speculators aiming to dump on their audience. If you are not the latter, you will be the former.

What's your favorite kebab sauce?

Are you even listening? This is a distilled clarity after years of mistakes and lost sleep. I was lucky to learn AND make money, many people are not so much. Back when I was just starting out, it would have been profitable for me to pay somebody a cool $1M to ram it down my throat. Take it for free and ask me anything.